ClawofCat (clawofcat) wrote,
ClawofCat
clawofcat

So, what the heck is going on with me?

Where may you ask is the next part of Why Won't You Go? Why haven't I updated pretty much anything from my to-do fic list? Well, there are a couple of reasons. 

#1 - Time. Now that I have joined the full-time working world again, I realize that there's not too much down time once I get home from work. After 9 hours a day, I want to sit on my ass, veg, and not think about anything. Dag...It really makes me appreciate parents. You come home from a long day, you're exhausted and then there are the kids to think of. How do they do it?

#2 - I don't do WIPs. Trying to get through this next chapter has been incredibly hard for me. It's plotty and dialogue driven and not too angsty. Whenever I open the Word document to look at it, I pretty much close it immediately. In short, I am blocked. But not blocked on the story. Everyday for the past two weeks I have written scenes that will appear in later chapters. I think I do one-shots so often because it's how my brain works. I imagine moments in time, instances of intensity and confrontation. For some reason a chronological sequence of events that leads from point A to point B likes to evade me. I also blame the journalism. I have been writing in short form for so long, I've forgotten what it's like to have to really plot a story. All of my pieces are so self-contained, have a beginning, middle, and end that stretching it out is this stupid mental feat.  

I've been really pleased with the scenes I've written so far, but at this point I'm going to have to buckle down on this chapter and get some guidance from the betas because it's really freezing me up. Same goes for my Spike/Dawn friendship post-NFA fic. I started writing it in April and it's just come to a standstill. Over 3000 words of straight description, not a lick of dialogue. What the heck is with that? I think I'm just not really sure what I want to say, what my conclusion is. At least when I get through Part I, I can rest easy that most of the Spuffy in Part II has been written and sitting for nearly two months. 

Also, I have embarked on the joint fic A World of Yes with twilightschild9and jdkitchen, and boy is it a blast. Because we're doing it together, it's like I have a whole cheerleading squad behind me supporting me through it and encouraging me. Also, it's light, humorous, has tons of characters and lots of sex. I like sex. I'm good at writing it. Therefore, I am happy. I had to wait for a friend of mine for an hour the other night, so I took out my notebook, had a vodka tonic while I waited, had a seat, and wrote a later scene for it with two characters I have never written before. 

I think that pretty much sums it up there. I will be supremely overjoyed if I can get through those three fics soon, especially since they have been languishing for 3 weeks - 2 months. I really wanna tackle the s7 Spike/Buffy/Faith fic, but one thing at a time. *pants* 

Oh yes, and I've found that my boss at my internship is a psychopath. I really miss my job... 

Tags: rant
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