ClawofCat (clawofcat) wrote,

Things get philosophical

Something interesting about being back from my trip for the last two weeks is what my friends and family have been saying about me - that I'm back to the person they remember. It's true, mentally and emotionally I haven't felt this good in... a very, very long time. And I wonder if that has something to do with my lack of updateyness on LJ. During the school year I was on LJ constantly, always hitting that refresh button or trying to work on fic. But things have seemed to quiet down in my head a bit recently and I haven't felt the same urge to read or write fic like I have in the past. Escapist entertainment, anyone? 

The last two weeks I've really been engaging with the world, seeing friends and family, dedicating my energies to work. I've seen Dark Knight, which is omg! splendiferous and everyone should see it, been to a wedding, danced and got drunk, had dinner out and walked around the city, taking in all its sights and sounds. There's always been something special about NYC for me, but I felt it so much more acutely as a friend of mine sat in Bryant Park last Thursday after work chatting about our respective trips (hers to Europe, mine in the USA) while the large fountain there bubbled away and a barbershop quartet serrenaded a group of curious bystanders. We walked through the crush of Times Square, up to 9th Ave, northward searching for a good Thai place to eat. After dinner we continued our casual stroll, the sky dark, until we wandered to the traffic circle in the center of Columbus Circle, decked out in lights and it's circular streaming fountain. When we got there we were surprised to stumble on an impromptu gathering of couples casually slow dancing to a boombox. Crouched along the statues and benches, people chirped and moved about, this cyclical spinning movement of the traffic, dancers and pedestrians making the city seem sort of magical. I love the unexpected. 

Though fic has not been a priority for me recently, I just wanted to say that all is well and I'm feeling a bit more at peace with the universe lately. Last Sunday I went to the Met with my aunt to see their new lapidary exhibit, which features 16th-18th century furniture, tabletops, and tableus carved out of precious and semi-precious stones. It was so impressive. 

I've got one more week at work and then this Friday I'm taking AmTrak up to Albany, NY to meet up with a friend of mine. From there we will drive to my parents summer house for a week of sun and sand in Cape Cod. We've been going for so many years that it's hard to think of new things to do there, but some possibilities that we have not yet explored include parasailing, kayak eco-tours, and a reprise of last years jet-skiing in Provincetown. I was there for two weeks last summer and the only thing that stands out for me about my time there beyond my birthday and jetskiing was writing Window-Dressing in time to post it for the anonymous sex challenge at feedmykink. LOL, priorities. 

Last night I pulled out a few photo albums of my 16th birthday party, which was on a yacht that sailed down the Hudson River one evening (you only turn 16 once!), my trip to Italy when I was 15, and my trip to Greece when I was 17. Looking back the pictures I thought how unchanged I look. A bit younger, but still essentially the same. Meanwhile, I think it might have been some of the most stressful and unhappy periods of my life. Those vacations were a bright spot in the misery. I think the lesson to learn here is - take breaks, go on vacation, learn to let go, stop and smell the roses. It also made me realize that I never made an album for my London trip in 2006 and have yet to make one for my roadtrip. I think it's an important thing for me to try and preserve those memories, those experiences that come with age. In the past I have gotten so sucked down in the mire, and these pictures should be a reminder that there is an escape and it's always within my grasp.   

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